Words of wisdom
Let 3 days pass before I say what I think should be said, if I'm hesitant from the start.
Also, stop carrying false guilt for his problem and choices. He chose on his own.
Nothing I said or did or may do will change the choices he has made and will decide to make. He's going to choose the same no matter what I say or do. I'm not pushing him into anything and certainly never caused him to choose this life. He was already doing these things long before I knew as he had already chosen his path and decided even knowing the truth and knowing how it was wrong. Some children come from really great homes, two loving parents and everything they could possibly want or need and they still rebel and choose what he's choosing. So doesn't matter what parents do, kids will choose what they are bent toward.
And I just thought of this: His mind and heart are going to choose the path he's determined to walk no matter the consequences no matter what I say or don't say or do. No amount of talking is going to change his heart. He's bent on following this path.
Just realize the brokenness and need for Christ. He's got this recording playing in his head that he needs to shut off but instead he's listening to it over and over and stuck in this endless cycle. Until he understands who he is in Christ, he will keep choosing to find his identity in the world. God can handle this. Nothing is to big for the Lord to handle. Nothing is a surprise to God, just a surprise to me.
Also, remember not to argue or allow someone else to control your emotions. At that age, the brain is not fully developed. And he's got a lot to learn, yet his ride may be telling him that he's doing just fine and doesn't need to change anything. Pride tells him to focus on looking good outward rather than choosing what is good and having a pure and clean heart.
Just remain in prayer. There is Hope in Christ.
Also, for the gossipers, just tell them I'm already aware and just pray for him. That stops the gossipers and those who will pray, will really pray for him and the others will go away.
Something else to remember:
Often times while pointing the finger at what parents do wrong and holding offenses against parents, kids failed to recognize their own sin and disobedience and things that they have said against their parents that the parent chooses to over look and not hold against them or decide that the child didn't love them because the child was disobedient and at times said hurtful things behind the parents back, things said that they may not even be aware that the parents know or found out.. Kids never consider their own offenses against others, another sign of immaturity, they only focus on what someone else did to cause them pain. Not thinking or considering pain they've caused everyone else.
Don't stop living.
God has a plan.
Never cease to pray.
Trust in the lord's love for me and for cordero.
You've done all you can. Put him in God's hands.